"Finally homeward!  I'll miss the interior and it's wide spaces, colorful Fall and fast coming winter snows.  Yet SE is something
special.  On the water yet in the glaciers and mountains.  
Spruce and alder and many berry bushes surround my home up the hill.
 
I got to take a prenatal yoga class the other morning.  I'm looking forward to dealing with soon to be mamas...Sometimes, I
get most fired up for nursing school.  Other times, I wonder when, in which life will I pursue MY art/poetry/movement/spiritual
path....
 
I can't wait...in two days I shall be home.  After 4 months, a new record of moving/inquiring, making contacts, I will go back to
one spot and begin a settled existence.  Still don't quite know how much will be woods and arts oriented, how much will be health
ed/maternal child slanted, what part will be putting summer and spring and next year's projects into order...I'm very excited for
whatever does shape up..."
 
--written by Laura, second day of Rosh Hashannah, September 30th, 1981 from Valdez, Alaska
 
My sister Laura embodied the word possibility.  She was an amazing woman, and though there were times that it was clear that
we were sisters with sister issues, there was rarely a time when I was not in awe of her.  I feel very lucky to have been Laura's
sister.  She was such a wonderful combination of dreams and determination and pure quest for something real.  I know that she
has touched many people in a profound way over the years.  I have heard it.  I have seen it and I have felt it.
 
"When I think of Laura, I see her sitting cross-legged on the floor of our cozy, off-campus, New Haven home, as she painstakingly
filled a page with columns of beautiful Japanese script.  Her luxuriant hair flowing around her, a cup of tea at her side.  Laura had
created a double major at Yale--Japanese language and literature and Religious Studies.  Her area of study reflected her character--
they combined tremendous intellectual rigor and high aesthetic value.  Only Laura would have had the audacity to tackle two such
demanding majors...and, the zaniness to integrate them in a compelling manner.
 
The summer after we graduated, we worked at Yellowstone National Park.  I remember Laura encouraging me as I fearfully made my
way across a log over a river beneath me.  Laura had already crossed without hesitation or trouble with her over-sized backpack.  She
exhaulted in being in the wilderness...She exhaulted in the challenge.  I found her fearlessness incomprehensible.  It was only later
that I learned that in fact, she was afraid, but her determination trumped her fear.
 
At school, as in all parts of her life, Laura charted her own course.  Her loveliness and goodness went hand in hand with a fierce de-
termination and independence to live life to its fullest and to make her mark....
 
There will never be another Laura Mann.  I love her and will always miss her."
 
--excerpts from a letter from her dear friend Katherine McGraw
 
 
I have been particularly blessed to share Laura's journey over the past four years.  On the day that Laura received her diagnosis, she
called me in tears.  I was hiking on Mansfield at the time.  I cried out "no" to the mountain.  But, over time, in spite of every possible
treatment option from aryuvedic to acupuncture to radiation to intense chemo, my "no," Laura's "no," and all of the people who loved her
so much saying and feeling "no," the cancer was stranger than Laura and we had to watch her let go.
 
The stories of her life reflect a phenomenally vibrant and robust woman who never stopped dreaming, never stopped believing in possibilities.
It was almost as if she knew that she would have a brilliant but shortened life, as she fit so much in...
 
Laura was an amazing gymnast.  A dancer.
She cross country skied in Vermont and tele skied in the back country of Alaska.
She kayaked many oceans.
She lived in the back country in Washington and Alaska.
She loved solitude and she loved intense companionship.
She milked goats.
Taught yoga.  Studied yoga.  Practiced yoga.
She learned Japanese.  Wrote Japanese poetry.  Lived in Japan.
Dreamed of studying many more languages, many more cultures.
She worked in Yellowstone.  Drove cross country with my mom.
She rode her bike through China, Tibet, Thailand and Japan for an entire year.
She gave us Jo.
She gave birth to two beautiful children--Iris and Isaiah.
She wrote and thought on a level that I could only tentatively grasp.
Knew that she wanted to work with women, wanted to become a midwife.
Knew that she wanted to make a difference.
Believed she could change the world.
 
...and, through all that, I loved her, leaned on her for support, got furious at her, laughed with her and cried with her.
 
Laura refused to accept that the cancer was bigger than her. She was a phoenix that rose from the ashes many times in this journey.
Stubborn and tenacious until the end, Laura insisted that she was living, not dying.
 
I will miss her being in this life with me.  I pray that her body is at ease and that her sharp mind is intact again.  I give her my
love and gratitude for allowing me to be a part of her world.

To complete the circle of our family, I too have a few memories and reflections that I would like to share with all of you about my life with my sister Laura who I loved so dearly-

I was fortunate enough to share a room with Laura for the first twelve years of my life.  I will always treasure the memories of playing with our trolls together for endless weekend mornings, on the rug that lay right between our beds.  I will also remember when Laura used to push the dresser that was between our beds against my legs whenever I tried to make my bed first.

I will always remember being the one to follow my sister around the world to meet her in Kyoto, Japan; Juneau, Alaska; and Yellowstone National Park all before I turned 20 years old.  One memory of our time in Japan that stands out even more so than seeing the majestic Mount Fuji, visiting MANY Buddhist temples and meeting Laura’s Japanese family and community of friends.  The memory is when Laura took me to her calligraphy lesson, she told me that as an observer I would need to sit on my knees and be still for the full session so that I would not offend her master instructor.  I dutifully did not move a muscle despite the numbness I felt in my legs.  In my younger years I always felt as if I had to listen to whatever my sister said.

I will always remember the years that we sang together during middle school and high school in our temple junior choir.  Through our singing connection we sang a prayer at Madeline’s wedding and we sang again at the Sabbath evening service before my wedding.  Our singing connection was recently rekindled as Laura’s cognitive abilities changed.  Two weekend ago at my mother’s 80^th birthday celebration and during the last few days of Laura’s life, when she could no longer speak – we were able to sing together. Music was a way that we were able to connect.

I will always remember and be inspired by Laura’s strong will and determination.  Her determination has been and will remain a motivating influence for me and for many of us as we carry on.

I feel blessed to have had Laura as my support during the birth of my second lovely daughter, Sophie.  And I feel blessed and privileged to have been one of those who shared and supported Laura during her final days and hours as she peacefully died at home.

During the recent high holidays as I was praying and thinking about Laura, I came upon this poem in the prayer book that spoke to me.  I’d like to share it with you -

         Birth is a beginning

         And death a destination.

         And life is a journey:

         From childhood to maturity

         And you to age:

         From innocence to awareness

         And ignorance to knowing:

         From foolishness to discretion

                  And then, perhaps, to wisdom:

         From weakness to strength

         Or strength to weakness-

                  And, often, back again;

         From health to sickness

                  And back, we pray, to health again;

         From offense to forgiveness,

         From loneliness to love,

         From joy to gratitude,

         From pain to compassion,

         And grief to understanding-

                  From fear to faith:

         From defeat to defeat to defeat-

         (or in Laura’s case from victory to victory to victory)

         Until, looking backward or ahead, we see that victory lies

         Not as some high place along the way,

         But in having made the journey, stage by stage,

                  A sacred pilgrimage,

         Birth is a beginning

         And death a destination.

         And life is a journey,

         A sacred pilgrimage-

                  To life everlasting.

Through Laura’s journey with her illness I had the opportunity to get much closer to her and to her family, Jo, Isaiah and Iris.  I will always cherish the time and extra bonding that Laura and I we were able to share over the past four years.

I will miss Laura on the rest of my life journey.  I am sure that her spirit is now whole and finally at peace.  I love you Laura.

Dear Yoga Friends,

By now most of you have learned of the passing of our fellow practitioner Laura Mann on October 19th.  Upon finding out, I contacted her yoga teacher, Rod Stryker, who was at the Himalayan Institute and would pass the word onto Panditji, who is a living link to the sages of the yoga tradition.  I have no doubt Laura left her body in the same fashion as she lived in it ~ in the spirit of light and love.  

There are no words I can write that will capture the entirety of Laura's generous soul.  Her time on this planet embodied karma yoga, true service to one's fellow human.  As a midwife, she revealed her passion for life by helping bring so many new beings into this world.  Even in the years of her affliction with cancer, she was able to create an institution ~ the Dhatri Foundation in South Burlington ~ dedicated to bringing health and healing to others in her beloved Vermont community.  It is a gift that will continue to serve many.

However, my personal experience with Laura was primarily through yoga ~ I think our first encounter was at a workshop with Beryl and Thom Birch at YogaVermont in the fall of 1999, when I had recently returned to Vermont.  Although on many occasions other students would ask me after my classes, "Who is that really flexible woman? Will I ever be like her?", I came to know Laura as a truly dedicated yogini who wanted so much more than just the physical boons of yoga.  She became a tireless practitioner of yoga's deeper teachings.  In late October 2003 Laura was initiated into an unbroken chain of the mantra tradition by Panditji in the yoga room of my Burlington home.  Laura's quest for self-knowledge and greater understanding was always evident to me, both on the yoga mat and as her friend.  Despite her own illness, she continued to offer ongoing compassion and a sense of hope and encouragement to me during mine, both in my brief time in Vermont in 2008 and by phone from afar.  Another yoga friend wrote to me of Laura yesterday, "She inspired more people than she ever knew."  Indeed, her reach was vast, and she offered her gifts without strings attached.  Laura loved yoga, and she often told me how she loved sharing its practice with all of you.

Our teacher Rod reminded me that as much as Laura was an inspiration to us all both in her wellness and through her illness, in making her necessary transition beyond the body, she is able to become even more radiant than the being we recognized her as.  Rod suggested I continue to repeat the Maha Mrityunjaya mantra on Laura's behalf during this time of her soul's passage and to see her as unbounded, expanding Light.  Despite the great heaviness in my heart, it isn't at all difficult for me to picture Laura that way.  It is the LIght in Laura that has touched the Light in each of us.

I invite you to take a moment to offer the Maha Mrityunjaya (Rod's translation again below) to Laura so that her journey may be swift and glorious.

namaste,
arlene

_______________________
MAHA MRITYUNJAYA (Victory over the great death):
Aum Trayambakam Yajamahe
Sugandhim Pusti Vardhanam
Uvarukamiva Bandhanan
Mrtyor Muksiya Mamrtat

Translation: I meditate on and surrender myself to the Divine being who embodies the power of will, knowledge and action. I pray to the Divine Being who manifests in the form of fragrance in the flower of life and is the eternal nourisher of the plant of life. Like a skillful gardener, may the Lord of Life disentangle me from the binding forces of my physical, psychological, and spiritual foes. May the Lord of Immortality residing within free me from death, decay and sickness and unite me with Immortality.

Meaning: It is a healing and nourishing Mantra - the heart of the Vedas. The healing force awakened by this mantra sends forth its ripples from the body to the mind to the soul. It strengthens power of will, knowledge and action, unblocking the flow of enthusiasm, courage and determination. The vibration of this Mantra awakens the internal healing forces while attracting nature's healing agents, creating an environment where the forces of both converge. This Mantra is an invaluable resource for healers and teachers. It connects us to the healer within and helps us receive the full nourishment from food herbs or any discipline undertaken for our total well being. The mantra removes physical, mental, and celestial ailments. It gives victory over Death, suffering, and disease. The Maha Mrityunjaya mantra removes obstacles and brings happiness to life.